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MFGG Games review Pt.1
It seems like forever since I've written on my formally beautiful, exquisite blog. And it is, do YOU remember when was the last time I, Blue Peach Alt made a new page to blog about my experiences with life? So as someone who's having their grandiose return to a website they once considered "home", I will now talk about a subject that hits Mario gamers close to home. Wanna know what it is? It's MFGG, also known as Mario Fan Games Galaxy for all the foreigners out there. Why the "Galaxy" part? Hell should I know, they probably added it because galaxy was ''such ''a cool term to use when mankind didn't have a broad knowledge of how the universe worked. Now why is this a touchy subject? Cause all you Mario fans probably used this website back when it peaked in 2008 and got inspired to become a game developer using crappy engines. We are now going to review some fan games from this website and get pissed at them. Starting from turd to polished turd. First up, we have: Mario's Adventure 2 Now what in the fuck is this? Where's the prequel? And why is Yoshi's Island music playing in a New Super Mario Bros. clone? Fuck this game! The first thing you'll notice is that Mario goes almost as fast as fucking Sonic! Oh and each time you get hit, you lose a life as Super Mario. Once you lose all your lives, you get a Game Over and have to start all over. Fuckballs. What is this, 1985? In today's generation there's this thing called Saving which allows you to save your progress. The hit detection in this game is astromonically phenomenal. Look at this! The Piranha Plant still attacks you from below even if you are standing on the pipe. The choreographers who designed this shitty game couldn't even get this to work like in Super Mario Bros. If by some miracle you happen to get past this section in level 3 then you are a god at getting by abominable physics. Onto the next game before I immediately leave my ranting solely on this failure of a game. Paper Mario World Paper Mario: Color Splash Wii U reviewNow, I'm all for fan games if we might be getting stuff like Epic Paper Mario after the previous atrocity Nintendo gave us with Color Splash. Oh, what's this? Newgrounds? You weren't suppose to see that. Now pretend this was actually made by the specialists at MFGG and let's move on to the game. By the time I just finished typing this, the music stopped. Seems like the specialists at music making composing the music couldn't have been bothered to make the music loop. Now onto some gameplay footage, for real this time. So here's the game's story, and all I'm staring at the Quality button and the only word that comes up in my mind is Poor. I shouldn't have high expectations cause y'know, fangame and all, but at least keep the quality at a bare minimum of Good. So the first thing you'll notice is that you can jump with the up arrow and hammer with the space bar. But you can spam the hammer, so you're broken for the whole game. Also there's a random robot that sounds like TEC from TTYD who will guide you. Let's just say he's the narrator cause we seriously don't know who the fuck he is. As with any horrible Mario fangame, the game will start to throw in a lot of cheap elements as an excuse for a challenge that can instantly kill you with horrible hit detection. Like with this big black ball. All it does is significantly drain your health and you die faster. Then you get a Game Over and start from the beginning of the game again. What a papercut filled boatload of horsefuck! After dying a million times due to cheap deaths without being given a password, I think this game should forever be locked in the archives of the internet and never see daylight again. Onto whatever atrocious game fate awaits us. Mario Star Adventure I'm afraid for this one. Don't know what it could possibly be. I think I should be wary of whatever fangames I come across. Oh, this seems like your typical mobile game from the app store in case your parents are too cheap to afford you a real console and a real game. So it seems like the game's premise is basically moving around and collecting stars. The only thing that could harm you are the ? Blocks which fall down on you if you move downward of its path. In other words, it's Dig Dug combined with crappy phone aesthetics. You won't see me play this one for too long and it's not up to quality's standards. Actually you know what, I'm going to beat it and prove to you all that I can beat it under a minute ASAP! Okay, if anyone remembers what I have said, it is taking a while to complete the game. It seems like the longer you play it, you have to indulge more catastrophic gameplay and look no further than these purple blocks with timers in them. Basically, they're mine blocks which explode solid rocks to progress, which can get annoying and is already annoying on a cheap mobile game. Since this bores your brains out, I don't see how anyone could complete this shitfest at once. I'm back and apparently on the antepenultimate level, aka, the 22nd level, there is a glitch with the teleports that prevents you from progressing as the teleporter doesn't teleport you to the other target. Sooooooo fuck this game, onto the next one. To be continued...